Genre: Action, Comedy, Fantasy, Horror, Thriller
Starring: Lily-Rose Depp, Harley Quinn Smith, Adam Brody, Austin Butler, Tyler Posey, Jennifer Schwalbach Smith, Justin Long, Tony Hale, Natasha Lyonne, Genesis Rodriguez, Vanessa Paradis, Haley Joel Osment, Ralph Garman, Sasheer Zamata, Johnny Depp, Kevin Conroy, Kevin Smith, Stan Lee, Jason Mewes
Review: Two teenage yoga enthusiasts (Lily-Rose Depp and Harley Quinn Smith) must put down their smartphones and team up with legendary man-hunter Guy Lapointe (Johnny Depp) to do battle with an army of mini-monsters known as The Bratzis - Nazi Bratwurst - and save the Great White North.
Ever since I saw Clerks back in 1994 I was a fan of Kevin Smith. He's had some hits and misses along the way, but I have always admired him for his enthusiasm, fandom, and creativity. Now, that that's out there... I was just confused by Yoga Hosers. It's just all over the place.
It starts out as a teen version of Clerks, which is fine, but then it wants to shift gears to become a horror movie of sorts. The biggest problem is that the tone never changes. It's always silly and nothing really seems to be at stake. It's not scary and not particularly funny either. And characters are introduced, have a big dialogue scene, and are never heard from again. Everyone seems to be having fun, and that's great, but it just doesn't transfer to the screen. It must have been more fun to make than it is to watch. And I'm just not sure who this movie is for.
Justin Long, Tony Hale, Natasha Lyonne, Genesis Rodriguez, Haley Joel Osment, and Ralph Garman are truly the best parts of the movie. They are all funny, but not in the movie enough and aren't given much to do. Lily-Rose Depp and Harley Quinn Smith have great chemistry as the leads. They have great energy and do their best to make things work with such an odd script, but they can only do so much. It's a shame. Oh, and how could I forget - Kevin Smith as the Bratzis constantly saying "Wunderbar!" is totally worth the price of admission.
And I don't know if it was me, but I had a hard time understanding a good chunk of the dialogue.Maybe it was a lot of Canadian jokes that went over my head or maybe I'm just not into the lingo the youngsters are spouting these days. Plus, the special effects were laughably bad. I know that Smith had a rather low budget for the movie, but that's no excuse. Lots of low budgeted horror movies can have good special effects if you get creative. The cheap CGI really gets laughed at rather than laughed with. And the hockey masked meat monster (yes, you read that right) looks quite goofy, but not in a good way.
I really wanted Yoga Hosers to be a good bad movie. It's just a bad movie. Only worth a watch with friends so you can make fun of it. Hopefully, Moose Jaws, the third part of The True North Trilogy, which started with Tusk, will turn out better. If I were you I'd tell this movie to, "Take off, eh!"